Why English Is One of

the Most Difficult Languages to Learn…

We polish Polish furniture.

He could lead if he got the lead out.

A farm can produce produce.

The dump was so full, it had to refuse refuse.

The soldier decided to desert in the desert.

The present is a good time to present the present.

At the Army base, a bass was painted on a bass drum.

A dove dove into the bushes.

I didn’t object to the object.

The insurance for the invalid was invalid.

The bandage was wound around the wound.

There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.

The two were too close to the door to close it.

The buck does funny things when does are present.

They sent a sewer down to stitch a tear in the sewer line.

To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.

The wind was too strong to wind the sail.

After a number of Novocain injections, my lips got number.

I shed a tear over a tear in my shirt.

I had to subject the subject to a number of tests.

How can I intimate this to my most intimate friends?

I spent last evening evening out a pile of dirt.

via The Prairie Rambler, February 1998

1. Life is not fair. Get used to it. The average teenager uses the phrase "It's not fair" 86 times a day.

    

2. The real world won't care as much about your self-esteem as your school does. This may come as a shock.

    

3. Sorry, but you won't make $40,000 a year right out of high school. And you won't be a vice president or have a car phone, either. You may even have to wear a uniform that doesn't have a designer label.

    

4. If you think your teacher is tough, wait until you get a boss.

    

5. Flipping burgers is not beneath dignity. Your grandparents had a different word for burger flipping. They called it opportunity.

    

6. It's not your parents fault if you mess up. You're responsible! This is the flip side of "It's my life" and "You're not my boss."

    

7. Before you were born your parents were not boring. They got that way paying your bills and listening to you.

    

8. Life is not divided into semesters. And you don't get summers off. Not even spring break. You are expected to show up every day for eight hours; and you don't get a new life every 10 weeks.

    

9. Smoking does not make you look cool. Watch an 11-year-old with a butt in his mouth. That's what you look like to anyone over 20.

    

10. Your school may be "outcome-based," but life is not. In some schools, you're given as many as times as you want to get the answer right. Standards are set low enough so everyone can meet them. This, of course, bears not the slightest resemblance to anything in real life—as you will find out.

Good luck! You are going to need it—
and the harder you work, the luckier you will get.